blogger profile

Becky

Sex and Relationships E-Coach

I work full-time in Charlotte NC as a Sex and Relationships E-Coach. I love what I do! When I arrive home at the end of the day I am greeted by my kids' three smiling faces (ages 2-8) and by my husband of over 12 years. ...

READ MORE

Say It Out Loud

It came out of my mouth awkwardly, and hesitantly, yet I needed to say it. I looked across the room at my husband, paused, and said aloud “I am in love with him.” 

I was talking with a friend who is finalizing his divorce - “just waiting for her to sign the papers.” I knew he had hoped to reconcile, and I knew he never expected his marriage to end. I could sense his sadness, but also a hopeful readiness to move on with his life.

In thinking about the marriages falling apart around me, I suddenly felt the need to admit that I don’t want the same fate. I needed to officially state my position, that yes, indeed, I was in love with my lover/husband/friend.

I tell my husband that I love him all the time, but there was something about saying I was “in love” with him, that made me feel the full impact of the words. I realized that I may love my mom, my kids, my dog, and I may even love Johnny Depp, ... but I am only “in love” with one person – my husband.

I realize that part of what it takes to make my relationship work is the ability to be vulnerable. Yet in that vulnerability comes the reality that this relationship, like any, could disintegrate when I was least expecting it.

That realization makes some people hide, makes some people anxious, and makes some people angry.

For me, it made me brave.